Life is like a road. There are long and short roads; smooth and rocky roads; crooked and straight paths. In our life many roads will come our way as we journey through life. There are roads that lead to a life of single blessedness, marriage, and religious vocation. There are also roads that lead to fame and fortune, or isolation and poverty. There are roads to happiness as there are roads to sadness, roads towards victory and jubilation, and roads leading to defeat and disappointment.

 

Just like any road, there are corners, detours, and crossroads in life. Perhaps the most perplexing road that you would encounter is a crossroad. With four roads to choose from and with limited knowledge on where they would go, which road will you take? What is the guarantee that we would choose the right one along the way? Would you take any road, or just stay where you are when confronted with a crossroad?

 

 

On life’s journey there are no guarantees and you will never know exactly where a road will lead you until you take it. This is one of the most important things you need to realize about life. Nobody said that choosing to do the right thing all the time would always lead you to happiness. Loving someone with all your heart does not guarantee that it will be returned. Gaining fame and fortune does not guarantee happiness. Accepting a good word from an influential superior to cut your trip short up the career ladder is not always bad, especially if you are highly qualified and competent. There are so many possible outcomes, over which you have no control. The only thing you have power over is the decisions that you make, and how you act and react to different situations.

 

 

Wrong decisions are always something that we look back at with hindsight knowing full well why we went wrong. Had you known that you were making a wrong decision, would you have gone along with it? Perhaps not, indeed why would you choose a certain path when you know it would get you lost? Why do we make certain decisions with a deep sense of knowing that it really is not the right one?  Most wrong decisions are made in the heat of anger, frustration or exuberance. It is only after you have made a decision and reflected on it that you realize its soundness.  It is therefore always wise to reflect on what you need to decide upon before making the decision. It is imperative that you follow the decision through in your mind and see the consequences of your actions before you decide. If the consequences or outcomes are good for you, and cause no-one else harm or distress then you have decided correctly. Otherwise, your decision was most certainly wrong.   

 

 

Since life offers no guarantee and, regardless of your considerations, you can never truly know that your decision is wrong until you have made it, at least by making a decision you get to find out. It is definitely better than keeping yourself in limbo and never moving forward. . Although it is true that one wrong turn could get you lost, it could also open up other roads to opportunities that would never have come your way if you had stayed still. It is all a matter of perspective. You have the choice between being a lost traveller or an accidental tourist of life. But take caution that you do not make decisions haphazardly. Taking risks is not about being careless and stupid. Here are some pointers that could help you choose the best option in the face of life’s crossroads:

 

Get as much information as you can about your situation.

 

You cannot find the confidence to decide when you know so little about what you are faced with. Just like any news reporter, ask the 5 W’s: what, who, when, where, and why. What is the situation? Who are the people involved? When did this happen? Where is this leading? Why are you in this situation? These are just some of the possible questions to ask to know more about your situation. This is important because one of the main reasons for indecision is the lack of information about a situation.

 

Identify and create options.

 

What options does the situation give you? Sometimes the options are few, but sometimes they are numerous. But what do you do when you think that the situation offers no options? This is the time that you create your own. Make your creative mind work. From the most simplistic to the most complicated, entertain all ideas. Do not shoot anything down when an idea comes to your head. Write it down, as often in the heat of creation we slip from one thing to another and then forget the great idea we had at the beginning.  Write down all thoughts, all ideas, no matter how ridiculous they might feel in the moment. Sometimes the most outrageous idea could prove to be the right one in the end. You can ask a friend to help you identify options and perhaps come up with a few you didn’t think of.  Then with all of the options written down go through all the possibilities, consequences etc. and make sure that the final decision is yours and yours alone. You and only you are responsible for your decisions and you are responsible for the consequences of your decisions, so think very carefully and listen to your intuition.

 

Weigh the pros and cons of every option.

 

Assess each option by looking at the advantages and disadvantages it offers you. In this way, you get more insights about the consequences of such an option.

 

Trust yourself and make that decision.

 

Now that you have assessed your options, it is time to trust yourself. Remember that there are no guarantees and wrong decisions are always reflected upon in hindsight. So choose… decide… believe that you are choosing the very best option for you at this point in time.

 

Now that you have made a decision, be ready to face its consequences: good and bad. It may take you to a place of promise or to a land of problems to be solved. Remember, the important thing is that you have chosen to live your life instead of remaining a bystander or a passive audience to your own life. Whether it is the right decision or not, only time can tell, but do not regret it whatever the outcome. Instead, learn from it and remember that you will always have the chance to make better decisions in the future.

 

It is my belief that we are on a specific journey in each lifetime and that we sometimes wander of at a tangent, often to learn new skills, new solutions, to be creative, but we always return to the original path we are on. I have been on many journeys in my life and have made decisions that have truly worried me even though I knew them to be the right decisions.  You see sometimes things are sent to challenge us and no matter how frightening they may seem when looking from a distance when the time comes and whatever you decided has been and gone you will wonder why you had such fear.  

 

A prime example to explain the fear, for me, is going to the dentist.  I have a fear of going to the dentist although I know in my heart that it will be fine and that when I leave the dentist I will be asking myself what the fuss was all about. When you have made a decision about things that will impact your future you will often experience fear but do not let this hold you back.  Go forward, feel the fear and use it to experience something new and exciting that will change your outlook on life, and maybe that of others, forever.